Once more with feeling (open)

[Jonathan Doom]

Fur flying in the wind, four legs moving in quick motion, anyone seeing the dog for the first time would have thought he was just a pet making his way through Hosgmeade. Perhaps, he belonged to one of the Professors at Hogwarts. Maybe one of the students had decided to hide him in Hogsmeade so they could spend the school year with him. Unless they knew what his animagus form was, they wouldn't know that the shaggy sheepdog making his way through Hogsmeade was none other than Professor Jonathan Doom.

It was after school hours, and Hogsmeade wasn't as full of people as it would be on a normal day. Jonathan had wanted to get away from the school. He wanted to get away from his house. He and Alissa had gotten into an argument that was blown completely out of proportion. It was the same as usual. He told her she was distant, she reminded him about the affair, he reminded her that she was distant before that, and she reminded him about his drinking. It was always the same. Except, this time, they had Danni and Lloyd but a room away. So, in an attempt to keep them from hearing anything more, he'd left.

He avoided both the Hogs Head and The Three Broomsticks. He'd indulge in his share of drinks later, of that he had no doubt. But at the moment, it wasn't on his mind. Instead, he climbed the steps of the shrieking shack, assuming his normal, human form once more as he sat on the top step, watching the few people that were near move around him. He remembered from his Hogwarts days that most people avoided the place. Perhaps, he preferred it that way. All the better to keep up the illusion that he was always optimistic.

OOC note; Just want to get a thread going with him. xD

[Deleted]

Hecate was at the shrieking shack. She knew that it was a place of comfort to her and it was always a special place for her to think and to settle down after a hard days work. She had asked Tony to watch Sky that day so that she could have some time alone and have time to think about how she and Riley were doing and to just...get away for a while. Everything was taking a toll on her and she was having a hard time with everything going on that she was slightly spacing out. She was having a hard time staying strong for not only herself but for her children, well adopted children and her daughter and for Riley and she knew that it was going to come out badly if she didn't take the time to settle down and relax. That's when she noticed the hogwarts professor and she slowly walked down to sit next to him and when she did she just kind of smiled a little.

"Are you doing alright Professor? You seem like you are stressed out. Anything I can do to help you in anyway?" she asked and knew that she was going to get stressed out from this but she couldn't stop being herself and not help others.

She had already relaxed slightly after letting some of the bad energy out and had taken the time to heal some of the things that she had to but it was hard for her to do that because she never had time.

[Jonathan Doom]

The shrieking shack held, perhaps, way too many memories for Jonathan. How many times had he and Jacoby sneaked away from Hogwarts and hid out in the shack? More than he could count. Funny how the last time had been nearly thirteen years ago and yet, it felt like it had only been days before. The thought passed his mind before he could stop it, bringing a sigh from his lips. Sometimes, he wished more than anything that he could go back. But he knew that wasn't possible.

He hadn't noticed Hecate there, nor had he heard her approaching him. The sound of her voice startled him, causing him to jump up slightly as he looked in each direction until he saw her sitting next to him. He was certain he'd looked quite stressed when she'd seen him walk up. It wasn't an expression he wore often. At least, not around people he wasn't exceptionally close to. He attempted to force a smile, managing to utter a "Hi," before she spoke.

At her words, the smile was gone. He considered them for a moment. Was there anything anyone could do? He wasn't sure. Maybe there were things he himself could, and maybe someone could remind him of that. Other than that, he wasn't sure. "Yes," he said and then, frowned before saying, "Maybe not. I guess I am a bit stressed out," he admitted with a nervous smile. He held up his left hand, wedding ring showing as he said, "Trouble in paradise," Of course, that was all he'd had on his mind. But at that moment, it was the primary thought. "I'm not sure there is. I suppose, it never hurts to have someone to talk to. By the way, you can call me Jonathan."

[Deleted]

Hecate didn’t really speak much though she watched him think and she in many ways wished she could go back in her life and help or change a few things. Though now thinking about it she knew that she wouldn’t change a thing from what happened in her life and she was happy where she was and now, she was truly happy for who she was with in her life.

She smiled when she watched him slightly jumped because of the startle and she was slightly worried that she might have had to deal with a wand being pulled out but noticed that he didn’t. she smiled calmly, and brushed her hair back behind her ears.

“Well if someone walked up they probably could easily tell that your stressed out Jonathan. I know how that goes about how there is trouble in Paradise, my Fiancé and I were having issues to a while ago about our child but we ended up being ok. It never hurts to have someone to share a listening ear even if that person can’t exactly help but just having someone listen helps a lot.” She said and rested her arms in her lap.

[Jonathan Doom]

Jonathan let out a brief sigh, smile still intact as he heard her words. He supposed she was probably right. While one usually couldn't tell when Jonathan was stressed, it became quite different when he was by himself. He had thought he was by himself and in thinking such, had let his guard down. But she had already seen him, it was too late to even think about the act now. Letting out another sigh, he said, "Probably," as though admitting it, "I just didn't expect anyone to walk up," he confessed, "Or anyone to be in there, for that matter," he added, gesturing toward the entrance to the shack.

"You were?" he asked, "At least you're okay now," he added with a quick smile, genuinely glad to hear that they were. Jonathan was the type of person to worry about most people, irrelevant of whether he knew them or not. Even as he sat there, he could hear Jacoby asking him why. "Relationships sure can be hard, can't then?" he mused, "You're right. It doesn't hurt to have someone to listen," he said, "It just starts to seem like all the wife and I do any more is fight. Just never thought we'd reach this point," he added thoughtfully.

[Deleted]

“I was already here by the time you got here. I used to come here a lot to think when I was at school and it helped me plenty enough as it was. I didn’t think people came up here at all for that matter but it is a good spot to sit and think away from others who don’t get you or to go to those that do.” She said thinking and remembered spending a lot of time there with Peter.

“Yeah we are good though now after we came to an agreement though it was hard on both of us to be separated. Oh they sure can be and sometimes people don’t see how hard they can be though everything has meaning and it is a give and take almost every time.” She said agreeing and dug in her rob pocket for a picture.

“Well everyone fights though. But, if you don’t mind me asking, what are you two fighting about?” she asked.

[Jonathan Doom]

He nodded at her reply, supposing that he had simply not been paying attention when he'd ran up. Granted, it was often in his nature to not pay attention when things weren't quite going his way. "Right," he said quietly, more to himself than to her, "And it caught me off guard, to be honest," he told her, "I didn't think many people came here, either. It's usually empty. Usually," he listened as she told him that she'd often spent time there. To get away from others. In many ways, he could relate, "My best friend and I would often come here," he said, looking back at the place for a moment, "We spent a lot of time here," he added, smirk spreading his face as he thought about just what those words meant.

"Separation is always the hardest part," he said, watching as she dug in her pocket, "I don't think I realized just how hard they really can be until," he paused, face twitching into a nervous and somehow solemn smile as he thought back several years prior. Michelle was a topic that hadn't come up much outside of Jacoby and Alissa. He wasn't sure he felt comfortable even mentioning it, "Well, things changed some years ago," he said instead, "Such a hard thing to realize when you were once so naive," he admitted.

"Yeah," he agreed without hesitation. "It's one of the many curses of being human, really," he sighed when she asked why they had argued in the first place. He wasn't sure he felt comfortable being entirely open about it. That was the thing about Jonathan. A lot of what he said were half truths. They were never really lies, but rather, truths that were missing important pieces. It had become a defense mechanism over the years, he supposed. "We have our differences," he said, "We seem to have a lot of them these days."

[Deleted]

"Many people are caught off guard. I hardly make a sound especially since I am head of the law enforcement at the ministry I am called the shadow of the night you know. Not many people do come here for they still think it's haunted. It is mostly empty. I bet you had very fond memories of your friend here when you both came here and spent time." she said and took out the picture of her, Riley and their daughter Sky that Selene took of them.

"That is true, it almost killed the both of us when we were separated from each other for a full week and we realized we couldn't be separated, for we needed each other more then we realized. That is true it becomes harder on the people in the relationship because of certain things. I guess it is due to being young. Things happen for a reason and those reasons aren't always clear even to the young." she said.

"We have a lot of curses of being human, none of them are easy but sometimes it can be easy depending on the situation really. Well everyone has their differences that's what makes us different from everyone around us, if we weren't different then there is something wrong. Well...the best thing to do is not to run from your problems but try to talk through them though they might not be easy, it's the time you try to work it through with your partner, you can't keep thinking it isn't going to work if you don't try first." she said and then handing the picture to him.

"This is the picture of my Fiance, myself and our daughter, Sky. My fiance and I got into that fight about who was the biological father of Sky until we found out it was his but during that time we were fighting but in the end we slowly worked through it." she said smiling down at their happy little girl who was waving up at the camera.

[Jonathan Doom]

He nodded, listening as she told him that she was head of the law department. He heard her nickname, shadow of the night, and smiled to himself. He supposed many people in such a career would learn to be quiet on their feet. He supposed that they had to. "Aurors probably make a career of catching people off guard, huh?" he asked, "My best friend's an auror. He's pretty quiet on his feet, too. Sneaks up on me a lot," He nodded about the shack. He supposed that even though there hadn't been any actual shrieking from it for years, the rumors had never stopped. "I've always thought it strange how we can live amongst ghosts when we're at Hogwarts and yet, many of us still fear haunting's," he mused, "He and I do, yeah," he added with a nostalgic smile.

"I can sympathise," he said quietly, thinking of the time he and Alissa had been separated. It hadn't helped that Michelle had been a newborn. "Sometimes, I wonder if we just get used to being around a person. If the attachment is because they're there. All the time. My wife would tell me that's a cynical way to see it," he said, smirking, "It did kill me, though. When we were separated. It was even harder with kids in the picture," he said, sighing to himself at the thought. "I think, they're not clear especially to the young," he thought aloud.

"My brother used to say that being human itself was a curse," Jonathan said thoughtfully, but quickly added, "Of course, he is batshit insane," with a snicker, "I don't think it's ever really easy. More or less, we just get used to it," He glanced at her when she said that everyone had their differences. That was definitely true. He and Alissa just seemed to have a lot of them those days. "I want it to work," he admitted more to himself than to Hecate, "I don't want to lose her, or what I have. I don't want my children to have two homes. It just gets..." he paused, not sure what word he was looking for, "tiring," he finally said.

He looked at the picture, smiling when he saw the obviously happy daughter. "You guys make for a beautiful family," he told her. He listened as she told him why they'd fought, recalling how Michelle's maternity had been the cause of their first major fight, which had led to their own temporary separation. "It's good that you guys worked through it," he told her, smiling, "I know from experience... that can be hard to work through. It's worth it in the end, though," he added, reaching into his own pocket to retrieve a picture, a still Muggle shot, and showing it to her. Taking post Michelle as most of the pre ones had been destroyed out of grief, and the few survivors were tucked safely away. "That's my family," he said, "Wife, Alissa, children Samantha and Jr and then, myself, of course," he added.

[Deleted]

“That is true. We do make a career catching others off guard, it’s part of the job description to be like that silent as a none moaning ghost really. Really? Who’s your friend? That is true that we can live amongst the ghosts but we still fear Hauntings themselves. I bet.” She said smiling.

“Sometimes I guess we can because that’s all we know or who we can get so attached to the person we married or are in a relationship with and we get close to them that we get used to everything. It is a cynical way to see it. I guess it does kill a person in many ways and kids make it that much more harder especially when they are really young.” She said agreeing.

“Isn’t that also true though. That human life can be a curse in many different ways. Well everyone is in their own way. Life in general isn’t easy and we have to get used to it in order to survive. Well as long as you want it to work that is a good thing too and you know, it’s trying that counts that you don’t want to lose everything you have because you want that. It’s hard on the children to go to two separate homes it is hard. I would have to agree and all. With my niece, well adopted daughter, it was hard bringing her back and forth to get all of her stuff. I guess it would be the same.” She said and nodded in agreement.

“Thank you. We try to support each other as best as we can though it is hard on both of us to be able to work and raise a daughter and try to see each other at the same time. We just don’t get to spend much time together, that’s always hard. It is good but sometimes it’s hard when you keep thinking back to it. It is all worth it in the end because it means we tried and we had succeeded.” she said nodding and smiling.

“You also have a beautiful Family. Your daughter looks to be old enough to go to school.” She said and smiled down at the Family.

[Jonathan Doom]

"It's creepy sometimes," Jonathan admitted honestly. It really was creepy how Jacoby would walk through his living room, through his hall, though his dining room, and go unnoticed until he entered the kitchen. It was like having a pet cat. A cat with Auror training. "Jacoby," he replied, smiling as he spoke the name, "Jacoby Michaels. He worked hard to get his job. Spent more time studying in Hogwarts than I've done in my entire life. Stresses him out, but he loves what he does I think. More than he loves anything else,"

He nodded, "After so many years, it starts to feel like you need the person to survive. Like, you can't do anything without them," he said. It certainly had felt that way when he and Alissa had been separated. And they'd been younger then. Not together as long as they had been together now. "Maybe it is. Alissa would certain say it is. She'd tell me, Jonathan, you should stop speaking so cynically. But when I do stop, she thinks I'm up to something," he snickered. Really couldn't win sometimes. "Yes, it does," he said quietly.

He let out another sigh. The hard part was getting used to it. Deep down, Jonathan had never quite fancied the idea of life. It all seemed so bleak, so unfair. But that was a thought he kept bottled up. Even though she had caught him stressed, he wouldn't let that thought out. It was better to keep up the act. "More ways than one," he said instead, speaking cryptically, "We've rekindled that love before," he said, smiling, "I'm sure we can do it again," Deep down, he actually wasn't so sure. But that was still a thought he kept to himself. "It would be similar. Does your niece still stay with you?" he asked.

He grinned, "I know how that is. We're both working, too. Gets hard after a while. I can't remember the last time we all sat down to a meal as a family. Usually it's just me, Jacoby, and the kids. Or just Alissa and the kids," he said, "It's always good to succeed," he added with a smile, "Thank you. She is. She's a first year, Ravenclaw," he told her. It really seemed odd to say the words aloud. Time really did move faster than he'd ever imagined it would.

[Deleted]

“I bet it is when a person is not expecting it. My niece, who is my adopted daughter, Selene, used to have issues with it when I would accidentally sneak up on her unintentionally at first. She was abused by her biological father and her mother and her brothers and when I had taken her out of the home she didn’t like being around people because she never trusted people.” She said remembering how it was hard on Selene.

“I know the kid. He spends a lot of time working and does really well and he works hard at it. I have been watching him a lot and he seems stressed a lot and he does a lot of work. That’s why I was interested in him when he wanted to become an Auror. I can tell he does, he put his heart into his work.” She said nodding thinking of the young man.

“I would have to agree, you start to need that person and without them you would die because you started to count on everything about them. Well don’t change who you are because if you do then they will not like the change. I have learned to count on Riley a lot.” She said nodding in understanding.

“Well I think you could if you have before. I would say that you could find a way to do that in order to find a way to stay together and work through it. Don’t doubt yourself. She has a place of her own now, with Airous but she comes by every weekend to bring Willow by to play with Sky.” She said smiling.

“I bet. It’s hard on myself, Riley and Sky too. Usually it’s Sky and I or Riley and Sky but none of us are actually together hardly except Sundays when we both have the day off and have time to be a family though we are most days but hard to sit and eat all together. Selene was so used to it though and she really didn’t hardly mind but she also cared deeply for me too and was always worried something would happen to me if I didn’t come home right after work or didn’t receive a message from me before hand. Your welcome. Does she like it at the school?” she asked.

[Jonathan Doom]

"It really, really is," Jonathan said as he listened to her words. There was something momentarily in his eyes, one might suppose that it was empathy. He understood what she was explaining because, in some ways, he'd been there. Due to his own family - specifically his eldest brother and his father - he himself had grown to be quite paranoid. Even then it was as though he always expected one of them to show up at any given moment. Always on edge, always waiting for something that would never come as his father was dead, or would probably never come in his brother's case. He didn't explain that, though, as he often felt such details about himself were better off unsaid. "A lot of people don't after such things," he said, "It's kind of like, paranoia," he said quietly, forced smile on his face.

Jonathan couldn't help but chuckle at the idea of Jacoby being called a kid. Though, he supposed that to her, all the aurors were seen as such in some way or another. "I should hope that he does," Jon said, chuckling, "He spent most of his Hogwarts years rambling about how he'd one day be an Auror. If he didn't work hard at it, I think I would have to chastise him for it," he joked, "Not just anyone can get the job," he laughed, knowing that he himself probably would have been turned down. It was a large part of the reason he'd changed his mind during his sixth year. It was Jacoby's calling, not his. "Stressed? Jacoby?" Jon said, grinning. Well, Jacoby could be quite uptight, he supposed it was easy to construe that as stress. "Admittedly, he and his wife are in the middle of a divorce. Maybe that's all it is," he said.

"It definitely felt like I had," Jonathan admitted, remembering just how low he had gotten when he and Alissa had split. It hadn't helped that he was unable to get sleep due to a crying infant. It had been his lowest point in years. Jonathan chuckled at her reply regarding change. In many ways, she was right. Of course, there were some things about himself that Alissa would probably be thrilled to find out he had changed. His drinking being a big part of that. Nevertheless, his personality was who he was. "I think there are some changes she might welcome," he said, "But for the most part, I am who I am," he added, "You really learn to count on them after a while. It's a good thing. Usually,"

He nodded, turning his face away as it deepened into a frown. He certainly hoped that they could again. He wanted to believe it very badly. And yet, something nagged at him deep down. Forced smile on his face again, he turned back to face her and said, "I sure hope we can," He listened to her speak and it clicked instantly. "Selene?" he asked, "I've known Airous since he was about this tall," he explained, holding his hand to emphasize just how tall Airous had been, "So I take it you're close to them, then?"

He nodded in understanding, sympathizing easily with her situation. "It really sucks sometimes," he said, realizing he was speaking like his students would and chuckling to himself at the thought. "I mean, you have to do what you have to do and work is important. Still, I would give anything for a normal dinner," he tilted his head, thinking of what dinners were like with his family growing up and frowning. When he wasn't leaping over the table to reach for Marcus' throat, his father was making a snide remark about his mother. Thoughtfully he added, "Without fighting involved," with a snicker. He nodded, "It's understandable. Especially considering you're line of work," he said, "I think so. I don't think she enjoys me being there, too, so much. At that age, they're more worried about friends and less about us parents. Luckily, my son is still in the parent phase. Won't be for much longer, though, I guess."

[Deleted]

“It’s more out of habit then anything but once your sort of used to it and expect it, it becomes better and more, well, something you just sort of grow with it. It does become paranoia but a person still has it but they learn to just go with it eventually and trust their instincts.” She said watching him carefully thinking that something was seriously wrong and wanted to help but only could if he was willing to let her in to help him.

“He does and he needs some time off but I am worried that if he has time off something bad would happen to him and he wouldn’t have the distraction of the job. He does do good work, I like how hard he works but he does need some time off, even just a weekend. I bet and I could see you pushing him to fulfill his dreams to become one. No, not just anyone. I can see he is but I don’t say anything to him about it. Maybe but has he actually tried to relax?” she asked him worriedly about Jacoby.

“I bet. It’s never easy for those who have to suffer without the other and it becomes difficult for us all without the other. Riley had said it was hard on him to be without me too and I know I was dying. Well…sometimes we have to do those changes for those we love even if it’s hard on us. I would have to agree though just don’t change to much or you will lose yourself.” She said.

***Memory***

She hated the fact that she held that information from him. She knew that she should have told him what happened before this all happened and went down hill. She knew that he would have a hard time forgiving her and to trust her again and she didn't blame him. She hated herself for everything that she had done and that Riley didn't deserve any of this, nothing like this and that he didn't deserve her and she didn't deserve him.

Tears fell on the parchment as she thought of everything she had done to him and that she should have just left and never told him anything and that she was never coming back. She should have just left without saying a word to anyone or where she was going or if she was going to be coming back. She put the quill down and held her head in her hands as she just sobbed, how could she have messed up this horribly and lived with all the heartache she was dealing with?

When she heard Riley she grabbed a tissue and dried the tears from her face and looked over at him and when she did she wish she hadn't for she burst into tears again feeling hurt all over again.

"Of course. Come, sit." she choked out pointing to a chair next to her and put the quill and ink away.

***End of Memory***

“I remember seeing airous when he was born and when he was slightly growing up until his mother died. I was best friends with his mother and I had dated his father when I was in school and it was hard on me to lose his mother cause she was the only one I had counted on and had been friends with through school. When Airous was born I was named godmother to him but hardly saw him because his father and I had many issues.” She said.

“Yes Selene, I think you met her, she teaches up at the school and is the day time nurse there too. She loves him a lot. I am close to them we talk a lot and we have family dinners when we can but that’s so rare cause of work as it is.” She said nodding.

“It does suck sometimes. That is true but family is important too I would, also, do anything for a normal dinner with my family and to be a regular family and have time with them. That too actually. I remember when my brother and I fought all the time, we still do and that’s why we don’t talk very much. Isn’t that the truth, it’s hard not seeing my family and risking my life to fight the dark wizards. I bet not, though I have a feeling, Sky and Willow won’t like Selene or Riley there when they get to school. That’s true that it won’t last forever but that’s why you have to hold on to what you have.” She said nodding.

[Jonathan Doom]

"It can be hard to learn to trust your instincts," Jonathan admitted quietly, "Eventually, you have to, but it's tricky. Because your instinct will try to convince you that the paranoia is justified. Even when it isn't," he added, shutting up as soon as he realized he was saying too much as it was. Jonathan didn't like speaking of his past with his family much. It was digging up old bones. Granted, they had made him who he had become. That didn't mean he wanted to explore them too much.

"Eh, I doubt Jacoby would ever take time off," Jonathan said honestly. Jacoby was the type who would continue going to work no matter what was going on in his life. "I think he likes the distraction," he added, "Though, you don't have to worry about him too much. Jacoby is a tough person. I've seen him deal with deaths in his family and he's always the only one who keeps his head on straight," Jonathan smiled at her words saying, "Yes, I did push him to. Not that he needed the push. He kind of always knew what he wanted out of life. Lucky bastard. Most of us spend years, even a lifetime, trying to figure that out," he said with a sigh and at her question, laughed before saying, "Yeah. Every night on my couch,"

Jonathan nodded his agreement, looking at her as she told him it had been hard on her and Riley, too. "That's the trickiest part about it all. When it's hard to be together, and yet, separation is just as hard," he said thoughtfully, "I want to change. For her," he admitted, half smile on his face, "but it's easier said than done. I've tried. Lasted four days once," He gnawed his lower lip thoughtfully, glancing at Hecate as she seemed to be in thought.

"So you've known him even longer than I have," Jonathan mused, "You see him a lot now, I assume?" he asked. "I've met her," he replied at the mention of Selene again. "Maybe you need a break, too. To spend some time with those whom you love," He suggested, the suggestion friendly rather than abrasive. "Siblings, right?" he said with a slight sigh, "My brothers and I don't speak much, either. Which is bad, actually, since one is living with me at the moment," he added with a nervous laugh, "They'll pretend like they don't," he said, "But at the end of the day, I think all kids love their parents. Even the ones with terrible parents," he added, nodding. After all, didn't he love his own despite everything?